Soldiers

My boyfriend got a call a few days ago from the army saying the unit he used to be in took some heavy casualties in Afghanistan. It's weird how much power hearing, or saying, words can have. Sometimes you know something, but it doesn't effect you until you hear or say it.

Those men were like brothers to him so he took it really hard. My brother is currently stationed over there too. He's in a different battalion though, thank God. Even just hearing that there were casualties hit me hard. I think about all the "what if's" e.v.e.r.y. day. It's always on the back of my mind. But hearing that men were dying, really brought out my fears. Why when I think to myself, that I'm terrified something will happen to him, I can hold it in and I'm ok? But when I say it and tell someone... I can't control myself and break down crying?

Are you serious?!

So recently I've had some friends posting things as their status on facebook.com that frankly, have pissed me off. I'm not mad at the people posting it, but I'd like to get my hands on the asshole that wrote this. It's about the crisis over in Hatti and people wanting to help them out. Here is one of them for you to read:


America: the only country where we have homeless without shelter, children going to bed without eating, elderly going without needed meds, and mentally ill without treatment - yet we have a benefit for the people of Haiti on 12 TV stations. 99% of people won't have the guts to copy and repost this!



Now before you go all patriotic on me and say they're right, listen to what I have to say. America is one of the wealthiest nations in the world, Hatti... is one of the poorest. Our poverty... doesn't even compare to the poverty of other countries. I know, I've actually been out of this country and seen it.

Last time I checked there were shelters for the homeless here. Right? While it may not service all of them (probably far from it actually) but they still are there and still are trying to help. BEFORE this disaster, 5 million of Hatti's 8.5 million people were homeless. Add that onto the rest that were made homeless from the earthquake.
http://www.assatashakur.org/forum/afrikan-world-news/33302-5-million-out-haitis-8-5-million-people-homeless.html

Children going to bed without eating? How many children do you know that have gone to bed without eating something? I've worked with the "poverty" in our nation. That rarely happens. Trying being a child in Africa with no parents, living in a reeking, hot garbage dump, hoping you get some scrap of food that day. Hoping.

Elderly going without meds? We are a nation of drugs. 100,000 people DIE every year from receiving the wrong medication! We have programs to help ease the cost for the elderly. So we shouldn't send funds to help pay for antibiotics and treatment for people injured in the earthquake? Wow.
http://www.articlesbase.com/health-articles/medication-mistakes-that-can-kill-1673355.html

To the person who can only think of themselves: Fuck you for trying to make me feel guilty about helping my fellow human beings. Fuck you for making this an issue between "us" and "them". Fuck you for living in your air conditioned/heated home, driving your own car, eating 3 meals a day, and trying to make people conserned about humanity look like they are selfish.

Ahh the gym...

I went to the gym this morning... finally ha ha. I've been going to LA Fitness lately and I really like it. I used to go to Gold's Gym but there were all of these huge men everywhere just staring so it was kinda awkward. I don't know how they got to be so big because I swear they just spend all their time staring at the girls in there, but somehow they managed.

So the boy at the front desk greeted me this morning. It was the second time I've seen him there. I know this because the first time was about a month ago and when I came in he said "It must be cold out there because your nose is really red, ha ha ha!" and today said "Wow, you look sick." No, I'm not sick. I just woke up and managed to drag myself out of bed to get here. I was proud of myself for doing it but thanks for bursting my bubble. I am also not one of those girls who wears make up to the gym because I sweat it off, and I turn as red Bob the Tomato after I work out (that is NOT an exaggeration). So adding more color to my face... not gonna happen.

The spinning class was ok. The instructor had some kinda reggea/caribbean (I don't know how to explain it) music going on that I didn't like a whole lot, but it was still a good workout. I generally like heavier music, but usually the only instructors that play that kind are men that are the size of a refridgerator and they yell at you, so I'll take the lighter music anyday.

Hiking

It's been raining like crazy here (weird, I never thought I'd say that in Arizona) so this weekend when it dries out a little, my boyfriend is going to take me hiking at South Mountain. I use the term mountain very loosely because I was raised at the base of the Rocky Mountains, so when my boyfriend first pointed out South Mountain I kind of snorted a little and said "Oh, you mean the pointy hill over there?" It's actually bigger than I first thought.

But, because of the rain, he says there's going to be waterfalls and streams to find so I'm pretty excited about it. I really haven't been hiking a whole lot. We went hiking when I was younger up near Sun Valley with another family. They said it was a short hike. Short hike for me is 15 minutes... short hike for them was 2 hours. Big difference. Especially when you're a kid and those minutes go by so much slower. It was really pretty and we finally pulled ourselves up to the top, panting desperately for air, and there was a lake up there. It was crazy... and cold. I know because I slipped on a log and accidentally sat in it. Then on the way down I kept falling down on the switchbacks with my wet pants, so it looked like I shit my pants then sat on it. It was great.

So I'm hoping for a better experience this time ha ha. I still need to go shopping and get a first aid kid, just in case. I need to get some snacks and water, and I think this time I'm going to bring and extra pair of pants, just in case ;)

Colds

I've had a cold the past couple days. It's one of those colds where you feel kinda stuffed up, but then you lean forward slightly and all of Niagara Falls suddenly bursts forth from your nose. My favorite! So I called into work to have my shift covered because I don't know when the deluge of snot is going to come out of my nose, and didn't want it to end up in someones coffee. Sorry I know that's gross... I'm just sick of it, literally.

I need a better job anyways, working for an hourly rate SUCKS. I'm almost tempted to go back to waitressing, almost. One of the most amazing things I've noticed here is that if a customer is a bitch... you can be a bitch back! I know, maybe that's common most places but it wasn't where I was from. You just took what they told you because if they complained, you'd probably get fired. Not so here, you can actually act like a human being, not a robot. It's great.

Anyways to top that off I got some kind of virus/malware on my computer called SWP 2009. Wow. I've had viruses before but this one takes the cake. I'm generally computer savvy, I'm not a computer programmer by any means, but I can usually take care of things. 5 hours. That how long it took to research and figure out how to get rid of this thing. It wouldn't let me download anything or start Task Manager, nothing. To after some research on google I think I finally got the thing taken care of... I think. It says it can respawn (like something out of hell, which is it) so I'll have to keep running scans that take years to complete.

If you don't have virus protection or anything for your computer I really recommend AVG Anti-virus FREE edition (that's right, free) and Ad-Aware FREE edition for the malware/spyware stuff. Both are available for download at download.com . They scan the downloads for viruses and I've used them for many things so I trust them.

Brides

My boyfriend and I are planning on getting married, he's asked my dad's permission to marry me, now we're just waiting to get the ring paid off for it to be "official." So my future mother in law asked if I wanted to go to the Phoenix Bitch Expo... I mean Bridal Expo ha ha. So I thought it would be a good idea to... get some ideas. I have never seen so many self-entitled women in one place, in my life!

I'm not one of those girls who's had this planned since I was 5. In fact I was the girl who swore up and down until the age of 22 that I was never getting married because I'd lose so much freedom (freedom was a big thing to me, I was homeschooled ha ha). But then I met Mr. Perfect and now here I am... semi/sorta engaged. And now all the freedom of traveling the world/doing what I want, doesn't even compare to not being able to do things with him.

Have you ever seen the show Brideszillas? That is how I DO NOT want to be. I can't believe those women sometimes. Their crazy rants over some stupid napkins or silly things like that. One of my friends once told me she wanted to be a wedding planner and all I could say was "WHY?!?!" and she went on about some nonsense that it was one of the most important days in a persons life and blah, blah, blah, things that didn't really make sense until now. I'd still never want to do that though, nope. Women are vicious!

So I do have a better idea of what I want for my wedding now. I'm just such a laid back person though that all that craziness seems stupid. Basically as long as our families are there, and the preacher, I'll be happy.

Fat? Seriously?

I can't stand girls that are skinnier than me, and whine about how fat they are. You thought I was just going to hate girls that were skinnier, didn't you? ;) But that's not the case. I just don't like girls who hardly eat, have a thin body, and still aren't happy. They make me feel like I'm morbidly obese because I weigh 10 lbs more than them. One girl was telling me how fat her thighs were so I sat down next to her and told her "If you have fat thighs, then I have the thighs of an elephant." She didn't really have anything to say to that...

And you know what kind of girls I'm talking about. They're everywhere. Those semi-good looking ones that spend more time in front of a mirror than they do breathing. The ones that are always on some diet or another. They're so obsessed with how they look they forget other important things, like having a personality for one. The ones that you go hang out with, maybe for dinner, and all they do is whine about the 5 lbs (OMG!!!) that they recently gained. All I want to know is where did they gain this supposed 5 lbs? Their purse maybe? That seems to be the only thing of theirs that has gotten bigger. Then you have to sit through the rest of the meal listening to how they are dieting and going to lose 20 lbs! Which will then leave them with the body shape of a little boy... goodie?


It's actually pretty sickening. So I don't normally make New Years resolutions (because I always forget what they were a month later ha ha) but hopefully having it here will help me. So I resolve to:

1. Not go on any diets whatsoever. I will continue to eat healthy and maintain the healthy weight that I am at now. A scale will not define my moods.

2. To exercise more. There really is nothing better for your body and your mind.

3. To really feel beautiful in the skin I'm in. People tell me I am, and it's time to start believing it.

4. To enjoy how I look now, and stop comparing myself to others.

5. To try and stop hating those girls... try ;)

Obscure terms

So I really like Facebook. It keeps me in contact with my cousins, friends I've met from far away places, and I can stalk my little sister and make sure she's staying out of trouble. It's especially nice now because I moved away from everyone I know, so I can easily contact my friends if I need to. But one thing I've noticed is people are always using the term "t-minus" and I was starting to wonder what it actually meant. I mean, I know what it means, but what the definition is and where it came from because it's kind of random. So it started to bug me because I'm sure they don't know what it stands for, they're just using it. Kinda like when people say they're "board" instead of "bored", or someone's an "angle" instead of an "angel", or just misspell a word even though spellcheck is built in now. Ignorance pisses me off.


So I started a search for it. I'm pretty familiar with military terms... unless it's a Tom Clancy book and then I'm good for a couple chapters before my weak memory starts to crumble. Then I just try to read the book without fulling knowing the acronyms but I give up after a few chapters, because despite the great story line, I'm not great with acronyms. Those books would be great if they had an acronym dictionary in the back. So I wasn't sure if it was a military term or not.


I started to think about it and my best guess is that T stands for time, but I wanted to make sure. Sure enough, it did. The website I was using (surprisingly urbandictionary.com actually pulled through for me this time) said it was used as a term of how much time was left before a rocket launched. So I guess some of my friends consider their life as exciting as a rocket launch. I beg to differ, I've seen their life, but whatever. So then I started thinking about it, and maybeI'm the ignorant one because it seems everyone knows this and I'm the only idiot who didn't. I hate when that happens.